Celebrate the Success of Others

One of the fundamental ideas of The Secret – again, not something that they discuss but it’s buried deep into the approach – is that to be in alignment with The Law of Attraction (LOA), you must transform from a competitor to a creator. That is, you must accept abundance as your distribution source; and that means that your success doesn’t impede or block another’s, and vice versa: someone else’s success doesn’t somehow “threaten” yours.

However…this is, for some of us, easier said than done.

When we see someone – perhaps someone we know and don’t like a lot! – achieve success in some areas of their life (usually financially), we can sometimes feel envious and jealous; we can resent that person’s success, and even start dwelling on all of the bad things that they MUST be doing in order to get success. We can even start wishing bad things to happen to them.

Why are we doing this?

Really, think about it. Why? Because – and only because – deep down inside, we feel that someone else’s success is coming at the cost of our own. This seems ESPECIALLY TRUE when someone close to us becomes very successful in their job or in some other part of their life. Yeah, sure, we’re happy for them…but deep inside, the wheel of envy churns and spews out negative feelings that we’d like to pretend don’t exist!

The way “out” of this kind of hell – and it is a kind of hell, really – is to appreciate and admire success WHEREVER YOU SEE IT. Don’t link that success to a person – because success is NOT personal. Success is like sunlight. You can have a home with windows in the roof and you can, in superficial terms, “capture the sunlight in your house” – but really, what could be more insane than thinking that you can capture sunlight? Sunlight is given to all of us as a gift – we didn’t earn it, we don’t help it, we simply (if we’re in tune with reality) appreciate, admire, and feel grateful for it. And if we can somehow put windows in our roofs that will allow in some sunlight, that’s great! But to think that you OWN the sunlight – or worse, to be jealous of someone who “has sunlight” is…well, yeah, it’s kind of insane.

So the next time you see success – maybe someone you don’t like (or don’t even know) has a car that you simply could NOT afford at this point in your life, instead of feeling jealous or reflecting miserably on your own life (“oh, if I could only get a car like that…if only…”), appreciate the success that has engaged that person. Admire the SUCCESS – as you would admire the sunlight. You don’t have to admire the person; you can if you want, but you don’t have to. Simply notice, appreciate, and admire the success.

And then start to admire success in other ways, too. Admire success in EVERYTHING that you see, and in everyone that you meet. Even things that you love complaining about – politicians, social systems, lack of this or that – start to see it from a different perspective. The very fact that you and I can communicate through a blog, over the Internet, is a remarkable success. I’m old enough to remember a time when, hey, even a phone without a cord was considered revolutionary technology. And now total strangers can meet in a blog and share a kind of intimate, personal growth and development experience. If that’s not a success story, I don’t know what is!

So today’s advice: please stop feeling jealous or envious – and instead, celebrate success. And as a bonus, remember: the more success you notice, the more you will ATTRACT. That’s how it works.

Until next week!

How Seriously Do You Take Yourself?

One of the most...confusing things about spirituality is the belief that it, by definition, must be very very serious. We're talking seeeeeeeeeeeeeriously serious. Trauma ward-serious. Funeral serious. Monday morning oh God please don't make me have to get up and go to work serious.

But...who really says that it has to be serious? Think about it. Who is forcing you to take yourself (and the things that you do with your self) so utterly seriously? Chances are, nobody is forcing you to see life that way. It's probably coming from within.

Now, here's my idea of why people take things so seriously -- especially anything that has to do with spirituality. It's because there's this belief that unless you take something seriously, you aren't taking responsibility for it. It's as if one of the characteristics of responsibility is seriousness; and if you aren't being serious, you MUST be irresponsible, careless, and just plain sloppy in whatever it is that you're doing.

But...like so many things in life: this is a really baseless belief! You can be extremely effective and surprisingly productive when you aren't serious; or, when you "give yourself some inner space." In fact, I'd say that folks who take things so seriously -- and always look at life through serious eyes -- are really quite unproductive when you look at what they actually DO with their time. And what's more, they're not just unproductive, but they're also very unhappy -- and they make other people unhappy, too!

Yes, the task facing you may be one that requires concentration. Perhaps in the relative scheme of things, it's a high priority task. And perhaps the context of the situation or event dictates that you remain quiet or that you clearly direct others -- perhaps you're a surgeon in the emergency room, or a school teacher, or a parent teaching a child how to cross the road...there are millions of situations where "looking and acting" serious are appropriate. But inside there is actually no need to clog up your inner space with serious noise. In fact, what you truly want to do is create INNER SPACE so that you can clearly see what needs to be done -- and see what doesn't need to be done.

So yes, act as the situation requires; respond to it naturally and appropriately and, indeed, effectively.

But seriously? Come now.

Have you ever seen a serious flower?

What is Success?

The Secret is kind of like one of those Zen parables that seem remarkably simple on first glance, but reveal layers and layers (and layers and layers) of enhanced meaning the more deeply you allow yourself to explore. I wouldn’t call this “deceptive simplicity” – rather, I’d call it ‘mysterious simplicity” – because the minute you think you’ve figured something out, there’s a whole new level of meaning to play with.

Take, for instance, the whole idea of success. Now, many people gravitating towards The Secret – either consciously or unconsciously – may feel pulled by the idea of “success.” That is, they want success in some part of their life. They want to experience success. They want to celebrate success. That makes sense. Who doesn’t want success?

But…the very idea of this – wanting success – compels us, whether we want to be compelled or not, to address an even more fundamental question: what is success?

Really. Ask yourself. What is it?

Is it a bank balance? Is it “stuff” that you have – cars, homes, other toys? Is it measured on terms of approval, the way that people vote for a politician (ack!). Or is it measured some other way? Is it measured in terms of peace, of awareness, of love?

I can’t answer this question – and I’m not even going to try. It’s not a question for me to answer for you – only YOU can answer it; and that means, you have to sit back, reflect, and really understand what success “is” to you. Otherwise, even if you GET what you think you want – what you think will make you successful – you won’t actually feel like a success. Somewhere deep inside you’ll feel…empty and confused; because that idea of success hasn’t been satisfied.

Spend some time reflecting on this idea, and developing your personal definition of success. Here’s a big, maybe even life-changing hint to get you going in the right direction: pretend that you were the ONLY person on earth. Really. What would success mean to you?

Slow Down to Speed Up!

Modern civilization – which in many ways is not modern and hardly civilized – is obsessed with SPEED. And this obsession has made its way into the very fabric of our lives. It’s almost like a kind of…scent. Even things that are not designed to be exploited for speed, often end up becoming crushed beneath the wheel of “how fast can we do this?”

Unfortunately, this obsession with speed has not been accompanied by an increase in quality. That is, instead of doing things faster and better, we tend to do them faster and faster, and spend whatever “time we saved” in our speed correcting errors that would not have been made if we weren’t going so fast! :) Funny, isn’t it? Sad, too.

Start to see if speed is dominating YOUR life. Are you focused relentlessly on “the next thing” that you have to do – the next thing on your list that needs to be crossed off – that you really pay little or no attention to the present moment? Are you living, essentially, in the service of your to-do list?

Remember: life is short! Even if you make it to 100 years…really, that’s not even a blink in the eyes of time – if you read a history book, 100 years doesn’t even get a chapter! And if you believe that speeding up your life will somehow help you get more OUT of it, you’re belief is quite incorrect. Speeding up your life to the point where you sacrifice the quality of the present for the promise of the future (which never comes, by the way – there is no such thing as “future”), is not going to help you get more out of your life. In fact, just the opposite will happen: years will FLY BY and you’ll miss them. It’s a paradox. The faster you live your life, the more of it you miss.

Take a lesson from folks who haven’t been…infected by the speed virus. Slow down. Simplify. Clarify. Enjoy the experience of being alive right here, right now. Because that’s all you have: here, now. Everything else is an illusion.

Saying Goodbye to IF, THEN

One of the most important teachings in The Secret -- I'd say, the most important -- is the basic fact that you have to participate in the Law of Attraction (LOA). That doesn't mean that you have to aggressively pursue your goals -- in fact, that doesn't work! As you must know from experience -- getting what you've wanted through aggression, manipulation, politics and other strategies has left you more miserable than before, with a shorter lifespan ahead to get it right...not a good deal.

What "participating in LOA" means is that you have to SHOW UP in your life; you have to actively decide, with the power of your intent, that you want to see a change in your life. As we've discussed in previous posts, perhaps that change will come from you; but more likely, it will come through and around you -- and you have to be ready for that change. You have to welcome it, embrace it, appreciate it, and indeed, be grateful for it.

And all of these things -- the welcoming, the embracing, the appreciation, and so on -- can only happen when you show up in your life. In other words, you can't play an "if-then" game with reality. You can't say:

• if life gives me a million dollars (or more), then I'll start being generous



• if life gives me good health, then I'll start enjoying my body



• if life gives me fame and recognition, then I'll start accepting myself



• if life gives me loyalty and security, then I'll start relaxing



• if life gives me approval, then I'll start having fun



• if life gives me success, then I'll start sharing and creating with others



• if life becomes more enjoyable, then I'll start focusing on things that matter



• if life becomes safer, then I'll start accepting other people as equals



• if life becomes more peaceful, then I'll start generating change and growth



• if life becomes more understandable, then I'll initiate and lead growth

And you can probably fill in your own "if, then" statement if you don't see one up there that, in some way, covers your current situation.

Today's lesson is simple (they're always simple!). Put aside the if-then statements; because the universe simply doesn't work that way...fortunately!

So...What Do You REALLY Want?

The Secret looks at three areas of life -- we might call them themes -- within which the Law of Attraction (LOA) can work: career, relationship and health. Now, obviously, LOA must, by definition, be able to work in other areas of life, too (it is a law after all, not a preference). But the folks behind The Secret decided -- probably after much discussion and reflection -- to focus on those three areas in the production: career, relationship and health.

Personally, I think they made a very wise decision in choosing these three areas, because they really do "cover" many of the areas within which we find ourselves searching for solutions or, more often, running into the same blocks and obstacles over and over.

However, as wise as The Secret is -- and without question, I'm a dedicated proponent of its teachings and I'm grateful for the contribution it continues to make in the world today -- there is a piece of the puzzle that really needs a little more exploration. Again, I'm not criticizing The Secret for missing out on this -- because I really think they had to make an "editorial decision" to either go deeply into it, or leave it out -- and so, really, they left it out (though they may indeed look at it in The Sequel to the Secret -- we'll see!).

What's the overlooked aspect? It's the title of today's post: what do you really want?

It sounds like a...well, maybe even kind of a dumb question, right? If you need money, you want money. If you're ill, you want health. If you're lonely, you want to find that special friend or life partner. Isn't it obvious? Well...no :) It's not.

You see, many people are actually confused about what they want. Or, to put it more pleasantly and in friendlier terms (because we are all about friendliness here :), they are not clear on what will actually lead them to the happiness that they seek.

Confusing? Let's look at a practical example.

Let's say that you're a self-admitted -- perhaps even proud -- "workaholic." You work at least 10 hours a day, including on the weekends, and a vacation for you is really not a vacation at all: the scenery changes, but you and your "workload" remains the same. And like most workaholics, you really don't see anything wrong or "unhealthy" about being a workaholic! In fact, you're amazed that more people aren't as focused on work, success, productivity, efficiency, and other things that are important priorities in your life. You wish the world would work as hard as YOU -- then things would improve!

Uhhh....(you know what I'm going to say, right?)

Hard work is good -- within reason, and if it's for the right things. But workaholism isn't good; in fact, it's a neurosis. It's pathological -- it is a mental illness. The fact that so many people these days share this illness simply makes it less overt; harder to see. But that doesn't mean that it's not a legitimate and potentially serious problem. People who cannot not work are not in control of their work anymore; they are simply trying to "keep up" with work. And eventually, energy levels fall...breakdowns occur...and things can get really, really ugly.

Now, this post today isn't about the dangers of workaholism; it's to help you understand that, in this example, if you are a workaholic, then guess what you're going to "ask" the universe for?

For peace?

For love?

For happiness?

No. You're going to ask for more efficiency! You're going to ask the universe to serve your neurosis somehow. You're going to ask the universe to help you sleep less, so that you can work even MORE. You're going to ask the universe to get rid of your inefficient, lazy co-workers so that you can work MORE. You're going to ask the universe to help give you more energy and stamina so that you can...yup, you guessed it: work MORE!

Basically, you're asking the universe to destroy you.

And, gladly, the universe is not really interested in doing that :)

And out of that fondness, the universe may not in fact give you what you claim that you want: more time, less sleep, more energy. Because deep down inside, the universe KNOWS -- even if YOU DON'T KNOW -- that what you really want is to be yourself; to be peaceful, loving, generous, and (yes) HAPPY.

And if the universe thinks that giving you less sleep and more energy is simply going to feed your ongoing campaign of unhappiness, it's not going to do it. And you should be VERY GLAD that it doesn't!

Imagine a child who loves ice cream (and who doesn't?). How "wonderful" a parent are you if you simply keep giving your child ice cream and nothing else? You're HARMING THE CHILD! Yes, a little ice cream is good. But entire meals of ice cream is beyond bad parenting; it's destructive.

The universe is not destructive. PEOPLE can be destructive, yes; but the universe as a whole is fundamentally creative (hence why creative people are the happiest people -- have you noticed?).

So here's today's advice :) Before you start asking the universe for stuff, sit back in a quiet space, relax, and deeply reflect on whether getting what you're asking for is REALLY going to make you happy -- or if it's simply going to add fuel to a neurosis or an ongoing sense of unhappiness.

Eckhart Tolle, author of The Power of Now and most recently A New Earth, said in one of his talks that there are two ways to be unhappy: not getting what you want, and getting what you want.

I think what he meant by this is precisely what we're talking about here today: when people get what they "think" they want, they're often profoundly unhappy...because what they thought they wanted isn't REALLY what they wanted. And so they start wanting something else...and then something else...and then something else..and even if they get it, it's always not what they thought.

The universe will give you what you want -- that is the nature of the universe: unending generosity. But what do you REALLY want? Sit back, relax, close your eyes, put your feet up, and reflect. Come to your inner center and start to see what you want.

You may be rather pleasantly surprised :)

The Secret of Being Miserable

The...what of what what? Yes, you read that right: The Secret of Being Miserable.

Really. Why not? After all, we've spent a lot of space here talking about The Secret DVD; and we'll continue spending a lot of space on it in the future -- especially when the Sequel to the Secret is released.

But right now, we can take a little detour :) from our path and look at something that many of us have in-depth personal experience with in one way or another: the secret of being miserable.

And before you move that mouse cursor over to the "comment" box, let me take the bold step of confirming that, yes, it is a secret; in the sense that it's something so many of us aren't aware of. You could say it's an unhidden secret. But given that so many of us continually overlook it, it's about as well-guarded as any other secret out there. Maybe it's even more well guarded because it's not well guarded at all! In other words, maybe we're expecting some complicated or "deep" answer that requires years and years of meditative inner-exploration.

Well, that's not what we're going to do here. Instead, we're just going to go out and blurt this unhidden, unguarded secret, and hope that the fact that this isn't wildly-complicated isn't a disappointment to you.

Want to know? Are you sure?

Because once you know what this secret is, you're never really going to be able to fully be miserable again. Oh, you may be miserable from time to time -- but it won't go as deep; it won't last as long. And for some people, being miserable is something they've cultivated for years. Saying goodbye to something that you've spent time with for so long -- even something as utterly destructive as chronic misery -- can be difficult. People become accustomed to misery; just as they become accustomed to joy.

Remember, too, please: we aren't talking about sadness, or even despair. Those are, indeed, authentic emotions that are worthy of experiencing in their own way. When we engage injustice, cruelty, loss of life or health, or any kind of suffering, feelings of authentic sadness and empathy can emerge within us. That is not merely "okay" -- that is HUMAN.

Misery, on the other hand, is a really lousy emotion; it's probably the worst one. Because it's not authentic; it's kind of like a by-product. It's like junk food. It seems to taste okay, but it's not nourishing. It just fills you up, but once it's inside you, it actually starts to act quite...unfriendly. Quite violent. Your body doesn't like it, and it doesn't like you. Misery is the same way. Your soul doesn't like misery; it doesn't align with it. It can do nothing with misery. It cannot transform misery into empathy, into compassion, into silence, into stillness, into anything of value. Just like junk food fills you up with "empty calories," misery fills you up with "empty energy." And your soul DOESN'T LIKE empty energy. It has dignity. It wants authentic nourishment.

So...

After reading all of that, are you SURE that you're ready for this? Because, like I said, even if you disagree with what I'm about to share with you -- and by all means, disagree if you want to! -- if even a tiny piece of your soul grabs hold of the truth of this, it will start to change your whole life. Remember: once your soul hears or reads the truth, it can never let go. That is the "characteristic" of authentic, eternal, timeless truth: it sticks to your soul.

Ready?

It's just one word (see, I warned you it was simple.)

And that word is...

Comparison.

Wait. I know what you're thinking: huh? What?

Shouldn't the "magic word" be something more...well, more miserable? Something like "death" or "pain" or "violence" or "greed" or something?

No. The word for today is comparison.

You cannot be miserable without comparison. Remember: we are not talking about sadness. Sadness is something altogether, qualitatively different. Sadness can be (and often is) quite beautiful and poetic. Sadness is a part of the human experience; it is something that MAKES us human.

But as we said, misery is just a lousy "substitute" for sadness; it pretends to be sadness, but it's just empty energetic noise that can ruin your day, your week, your year, your decade -- and for many people, most of their ENTIRE ADULT LIFE.

Think about it. Really. After you "close" this blog, sit back and think about it for yourself. How can you be miserable if you don't compare?

Comparison is the language of the ego. The ego cannot exist unless it is comparison. After all, the ego is obsessed with analysis: with giving names to things, with categorizing them, with pretending that it "knows" what something is, simply because it "knows" what that thing is called. And how can you know something without comparison?

Don't get me wrong. When you decide what to watch on TV, what websites to visit, what car to buy, what home to buy, or even what to name your new cat, you may indeed be comparing -- but that comparison is entirely different than the kind we're talking about here. That comparison is intelligence. It's simply looking at the reality of different things and making an informed decision. There is no suffering in it; there is no poor me story. There is no emotional drama attached to it. You simply choose the option that fits with your requirements, your goals, or whatever else. That's normal; that's healthy.

But when you dwell in comparison -- when you sit and ruminate miserably on what you "could" have that you don't, what your rivals have that you don't, what you could be "if it weren't for a limitation"...then you are entering the realm of misery.

Sound bizarre? Again: don't take my word for it. THINK about it. Reflect on it for as long as you'd like, and then the next time you feel yourself descending into misery, try and give yourself a little "wake up" call and think of this blog. See the mechanism of comparison as it is working in you.

When you see it, something utterly miraculous happens: you are no longer unconscious of it. You become the witness of your own mechanical misery-making machine. And that's the first step towards joy.

Try it. I'd love to hear about your experiences -- please share!

Until tomorrow...

More on LOA and Change

Hello again friends. Last time we met here, we asked "whether you were embracing change?" and looked at how life is change -- and therefore, that the Law of Attraction (LOA) is change, too. We looked at how a situation may be trying to change in ways that, deep down inside, we may be resisting simply because the change isn't what we expected, envisioned or even dreamed of.

Today, I'd like to elaborate a bit more on this, because I think this particular issue -- change -- is really the defining element (for lack of a better word) of whether LOA will work for you or won't. True, there are many other aspects to consider, but I think that this is the MAJOR roadblock for some: dealing with change.

You see, it's not that change can "occur" in ways that we didn't envision; it's that the change we're seeing may seem negative from our short-term, limited perspective. And that can really SCARE us from pursuing anything remotely connected to LOA; and ultimately, squash our dreams before they have a chance to manifest in our lives.

For example, let's say that you "hang around" with people who share with you a unifying common denominator: you complain about things that you don't like about life. Now, these complaints may not be very mean-spirited (or then again, they might be). And some of those complains may be quite valid, from a "common sense" point of view (or then again, they might not). But whatever the unique configuration of your complaint-based-relationship may be, it's enough to say that the glue that holds it together is a kind of chronic, ongoing, endless, aimless, rather dedicated effort to complain about something not being the way it should.

And this may have gone on for so long -- decades, perhaps -- that, oddly, there is a kind of...enjoyable tolerance of the misery of complaining. There is a kind of nourishment that comes from it; a kind of therapy, really, from complaining. It's kind of like scratching an itch; it feels GOOD to scratch an itch, but if you keep scratching it for years and years, not only will you do some really serious damage to whatever you happen to be scratching (your leg, your face, whatever), but you'll also never actually SOLVE the itch. You'll just scratch the symptom.

Complaining, in and of itself, unmotivated and without any actual purpose, is like scratching a mental itch. It feels good, but if you do it for the long term, it's kind of...well, it's really kind of insane, really. Of course, so many people do it, that it seems normal; or, at least, there are so many more abnormal things out there that are worthy of the term abnormal. I mean, with people getting out of their cars and beating each other up, or people doing all kinds of other mad things, mere complaint seems to be the least of our social or personal problems.

Be that as it may...

Now, let's say that you start bringing LOA principles into your life. You start finding things to be grateful for. You start seeing solutions instead of problems. You start seeing beneficial opportunities for creation (even if they're very small and minor). You start becoming friendly with life itself; in a way that, perhaps, you haven't done since you were a small child.

Guess what's going to happen to your chronic "complaint-based-relationship"? It's going to change. It has to change.

And for many people, that can be a big emotional problem -- because who wants relationships to change and crumble; even if those relationships aren't nourishing, helpful or positive? We all want to think that friendships are stronger than preferences; that there is something deep and abiding about them. This is, ideally, true.

But it's simply a question of balance: by adding LOA into your life, other things will change. You don't even have to change them; in fact, you almost certainly WON'T have to change anything. New people will simply enter your life -- that's the fun part. And existing people will EXIT YOUR LIFE or at least take a much reduced role in it; and THAT can be difficult. It can make you feel like a bad friend, a bad person, or even expose you to rather dreadful criticism from people who are offended that you have the audacity to change. Maybe in the past you complained as much as anyone else in the group, and now, you simply don't contribute. You don't PREACH your views of LOA or anything else (don't do that!), but you simply don't contribute in the ways that you used to.

This can, will, and does offend people who aren't on the same path as you.

Some will follow and be inspired by what is changing in you. That's wonderful.

Some...will resent you, ridicule you, maybe even attack you -- YOU can become the subject of that criticism, all of a sudden.

This can make you feel incredibly sad inside; and may shake your commitment to transforming your life.

The choice -- as it has always been -- is up to you.

Things will come to you -- things that you like. That is positive change. Things will LEAVE you -- things that you thought you liked -- and that can seem negative.

It's up to YOU to alertly, and with awareness, embrace the new, and gently let go of what has to go. It may be relationships. It may be habits and behavior patterns. It may be small things -- it may be big things.

Remember, some things will leave you WITHOUT first "asking you" if it's okay :) And this may seem very negative. A job may leave you. Something else that you valued may leave you.

Again: stay alert, be aware, and give yourself the chance to really SEE what is happening. Don't react to events; respond to them. Adjust to them. And embrace change -- change is LIFE.

Are You Embracing Change?

One of the enduring aspects of The Secret is, of course, it’s underlying reference to the Law of Attraction (LOA).

And while LOA is quite simple in and of itself – it’s essentially the principle of like attracts like – there are aspects about it that are a bit more sophisticated and quite elegant. Understanding this deeper level will likely help you understand why LOA is working for you or why it ISN’T working for you.

This deeper elegance of LOA is really about the most emotionally-loaded word in the language; and probably, the word most responsible for more creation, more destruction, more love, more hate, more peace, more war, and more everything than anything else.

This word, of course, is change.

Life is not merely “about change” – it is synonymous with change. If the word “life” were to somehow disappear altogether from the English language, it could (and perhaps even should) be replaced by the word ‘change.’

Life cannot be static. Even if it seems to be routine, ritualistic or just plain repetitive at times, this is a perception; not a reality. As old Hereclitis says: you cannot step in the same river twice. He’s right. Change is built into the very fabric of life. It is the raw ingredient from which life is created, expressed, and ultimately, transformed from one form to another.

Now, here’s the thing: since LOA is an aspect of life, this must mean that LOA is an aspect of change. In other words: if you want to benefit from LOA, you must – by definition – accept change as part of your life.

And that, for many people is…well, it’s a problem! Because change means opening up to something new; it means, fundamentally, surrendering yourself to unimagined possibilities. It means letting go of what you think you know, because what you don’t know may very well be the change that needs to come into your life for LOA to “work” in the way that you want.

Let’s look at a practical example to help illustrate this.

Imagine that you’re in a stressful corporate-type job and it’s just becoming an exhaustive, draining, depressing experience. Instead of looking forward to another day on the job, you’re dreading it. And worse, because you’re getting “older” each day, you find yourself with less energy to stay alive (or merely survive) in your unfriendly, political and “left-brain dominated” corporate landscape.

Now, let’s say that you watch The Secret (click the link to get a copy if you haven’t seen it yet) and accept that, yes, LOA could help you free yourself from this knot of corporate pain and start your own home-based business. You may even have a friend or family member who has started their own home-based business, or you may have seen an Internet site or been to a seminar, and so you have an “idea” of what a home-based business could be about: and you want it!

And so you start absorbing and expressing the LOA principles: ask, believe, receive. And you do this with sincere intensity for several weeks, but…nothing happens. Things at work may have even become worse (it’s possible).

What might be happening here?

Paradoxically, the belief that the ONLY way to change your negative work situation is to start a home-based business (of one kind or another) may, actually, be PREVENTING your solution from manifesting itself! In other words: because you are “locked into” solving your problem a certain way, you may be resisting the change that has to take place into your life. You’re basically trying to PRESCRIBE the universe on “how to help you.” You're directing; not accepting.

The universe, fortunately, doesn’t work that way. Can you imagine the tires on a car all “intent” on going in a different direction – even of those different directions were, in themselves, ethical and “good”? The car would come apart. It would be destroyed; and the tires would actually lose far, far more than they gain, because the very vehicle that “drove” them – the body of their being – would be broken and unable to move them anywhere at all.

The message for you today, is to accept that, maybe, the change that has to happen in your life ISN’T what you envision it to be. Yes, your work situation may be a kind of living hell right now (and many work situations certainly are!). But maybe a home-based business isn’t the kind of positive change that you need. Maybe what you need to do is take a class in the evening, or maybe volunteer some of your time, or let something ELSE come into your life that will, ultimately, create a better situation for you. Maybe your workplace will start letting you do more work at home through the Internet.

Or it may be something that you can’t even imagine right now.

Yes, LOA promises that a solution to your problem is “on the way.” Now it’s up to YOU to position yourself to receive that solution. If you become obsessed with receiving only a particular solution – one that “fits” with your vision of what it “should be,” then you will almost certainly miss out on what is meant for you.

Be open, be alert, be welcome, and be aware. Watch how the universe conspires (in the nice way) to CHANGE your situation to the better.

The universe is always – always – focused on positive change. Always.

Embrace change. And then see how LOA “works” FOR you!

Darwin Re-Created

Hello friends! Yesterday, we closed off by pointing to a new topic that will possibly -- profoundly -- change your perception of the famous Darwinian phrase survival of the fittest.

Now, I'm very confident (in the humble way, not the arrogant way!) that very quickly, you'll see how simple what I'm trying to share with you today really IS. Indeed, one of the characteristics of all real wisdom is that it's simple.

Of course, it may not seem simple at first; but once you "get it," you can't help buy reflect and go: ohhhhhh yeah, that's so simple!

The reason I'm sharing all of this, is because before we can visit our good friend Charles Darwin, I'd like us to visit our other good friend: The Secret :)

(By the way, if you haven't yet seen The Secret or mapped out its various beneficial aspects, click on this link and you'll be amazed at what you can learn -- and yes, it's simple!)

Now, in The Secret, one of the underlying themes that is either overtly discussed or subtly alluded to, is that we create our own reality. That is, reality is not something "out there" -- it's as much an expression of what's "in here" -- in each one of us -- as it is anything else. In other words: reality is a dialogue between the outer and the inner. We aren't passive observers who simply "objectively" see reality for what it is. Indeed, real objectivity does not exist. You may need to read that again because it's a powerful, potentially transformative statement of fact: real objectivity does not exist. And that is the reason -- and the only reason -- why we create our realities; or, at the very least, we contribute to our realities in much deeper ways that we can "detect" using our senses or our intellect.

So....what? Good question. We aren't done yet :)

Another way of understanding this basic fact is through the word filtering. We filter our reality through our perceptions; and that means that WE SEE WHAT WE EXPECT TO SEE.

Sounds weird? Yes, maybe -- but if we look into our own personal experience, we can see that this is indeed quite true. Do you remember being in love? Or the days after a blissful, inspiring experience? How does the world look? If you have to stand in line an extra few minutes because the employees are chatting aimlessly, or you get stuck in traffic longer than you expected, or it rains all the time, or something else "negative" happens...do you care? If you do, then it's just barely caring.

Now picture yourself on one of your BAD DAYS. How much tolerance do you have for even the slightest inconvenience? How do you respond to bad weather, to traffic jams, to "rude people" at work or the daily, ordinary, frusterating things of life itself?

Obviously, something has to be "different" about these situations. The rain is the same. The traffic is the same. The aimless talkative employees are the same. Everything else is the same. YOU are different! Your perception is different; your FILTER is different. You are simply "changing" how you see reality; or rather, your unconsciousness is changing it for you. That's why you can go through a similar experience in two different "moods" and experience wildly different emotions, and even conclude wildly different facts. Those chatty employees can go from being "carefree and playful" to "JUST PLAIN EVIL FIRE THEM ALL!! AHHHH!"

:)

Now, with all of this in mind, let's jump over to Charles Darwin and his rather oft-borrowed (and widely misunderstood) observation that only the fittest survive.

You see, in today's world, the people who tend to "use" this observation almost always use it as a justification for a very (very) aggressive approach to life. They see life as a threatening jungle within which everything is out to eat everything else -- or if not eat it, then harm or destroy it "just because that's what things do in the jungle."

But...ah, yes, you're thinking it with me now, right? THEY'RE FILTERING! They're doing exactly what The Secret says they're doing: they're seeing reality through the filter of "dog eat dog." Naturally, they'll see this wherever they look. In fact, they might see ten or even one hundred examples of harmonious cooperation; but the ONE time someone fights with someone else, they'll pay attention, look at you and say: see? see? I told you! Survival of the fittest! So what, really, does this tell us about Darwin's statement? It tells us that Survival of the Fittest does not mean what we think it means!

It does NOT mean that "only the strong survive." It means only the aware survive, because only the aware are aware that they're filtering! Only the aware -- that is, only those who are grounded in the present and conscious of what's really happening -- can adapt to reality and see it for what it is.

That's what Darwin meant.

It's survival of the fittest, yes. But the fittest doesn't mean the most aggressive. It means the most conscious; the most aware.

Your task? Filter your world around awareness and consciousness. See awareness and consciousness in your life. When you look at a flower: LOOK. Don't think about the flower, what it's called, whether it would look nice in your garden, or whatever. Be conscious. Be aware.

Start small, and then keep adding more and more awareness and consciousness into your life. Eventually, small things will become big things: relationships, career, social contribution...it will all be filtered through your lens of awareness and consciousness.

If Darwin were here, I can only imagine he'd be bookmarking this blog :)

Until tomorrow!

Creative vs. Competitive

One of the most interesting -- and important -- aspects of The Secret is this: creativity is not competition. In fact, they're polar opposites.

However, in today's business world (and probably other worlds, too, such as some social worlds and recreation worlds) it's extremely easy to "believe" in the overwhelming power of "scarcity." And that belief drives us to compete, not to create.

One of the reasons that this is so challenging in everyday life, is that we can easily forget just what it means to create, and what it means to compete. In other words: we can, somehow, delude ourselves into thinking that we're creating when we're really competing. During these times -- and they usually happen when we're under stress and unaware of our present moment realities -- we could really use some simple, clarifying pointers to help guide the way. That's what we'll focus on today.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE COMPETING IF...

• you cannot "win" without making someone else "lose"


• your underlying motivation to take action is based on fear


• you are making decisions and/or taking actions that you know are not in alignment with your values -- but you have to "silence" this inner voice


• you cut yourself off from the feeling of what you're doing, and become completely cerebral and "stuck in your head"


• you do not honestly feel good about your accomplishments; instead, you feel empty, guilty or ashamed


• the value of your contribution has actually taken away something from the world -- it may be very small and perhaps nobody will notice, but YOU know


• if you met yourself (really, pretend that you did), you wouldn't be able to look yourself in the eye and clearly describe what you're doing, why you're doing it, and why you don't stop doing it

YOU KNOW YOU'RE CREATING IF...

• you can only win when other people win alongside you


• your motivations are self-generating; instead of "talking yourself into" doing something, you simply ride a wave of authentic enthusiasm that is beyond your power to incite


• you are not obsessed by the outcome of your actions, but powerfully aware that the means and the ends are, in fact, part of the very same contiuum and are "part" of each other (much as the cloud is part of the rain; and the rain is part of the ocean)


• you are open and adjust to reality and to nature; you don't impose your agenda on the world, but instead, embrace and respond to it


• you would do what you're doing regardless of whether anyone was there to applaud, appreciate, or pay you to do it


• if you met yourself, you'd give yourself a great big HUG for being so creative :)

As you can see, the difference between creating and competing is quite vast; it's the difference between a positive contribution and a negative contraction; between giving something fresh and new to the world, or taking something from it; something that could have been divine and celebrated.

Yes, of course, here in our nice friendly blog, it's easy to see the difference: it's day and night, white and black. But "in reality" -- particularly in the business world -- it's so easy to lose this clarity, and to start "moving" that line between what we know to be creative, and what we know to be competitive.

When those moments emerge in your life -- and yes, they will happen; that's the nature of life to test us in many ways -- then please consider coming back to this safe, friendly blog and re-reading this post (you may even want to bookmark it). It could be the clarifying wake-up call that you need to ensure that your path is the creative...not the competitve.

Tomorrow, we'll talk about something that many of you are going to find very, very interesting -- we're going to visit our old pal Charles Darwin, and re-create his so called "survival of the fittest" observation. It's something that will affect many of you and help you really understand whta Darwin meant -- and what it means NOW. Check back tomorrow and see for yourself!

Until then...

An Attitude of Gratitude!

Yesterday, we looked at the basic fact that attention is nourishment. And to illustrate how to become more attentive about something helpful, positive and valuable in your life (and naturally, in the lives of those around you), we looked at the "gratitude rock" idea from The Secret. (By the way -- The Sequel to the Secret is going to be out very soon; please stay tuned to this blog and I'll keep you updated!).

Today, I'd like us to look more deeply at the concept of gratitude.

Now, you may be wondering (as I'd be wondering if I were you) why we should focus more on something that we already understand. After all, each of us has experience of being grateful; and yes, each of us have experience of not being grateful -- or, indeed, of someone not expressing gratitude towards us and thereby making us feel...well, I guess really bad is the only term I can use. "Humiliated" also fits.

The basic point is: we all "understand" gratitude, and we all have experiences -- many experiences -- to draw upon if we need a little refresher of the creative, nourishing power of gratitude AND the destructive, harmful power of ingratitude.

So...if we're all such gratitude-experts, why do we want to spend more time learning about it here?

The simple answer to that question is: honestly, it's just plain hard to be grateful these days.

Really. Open up a newspaper, turn on the news, or even just browse through the web and you'll almost certainly (I'd say absolutely certainly) bump into 20 "bad news" events before connecting with one that is even mildly positive; that is, something that you could, somehow, be grateful for.

Actually, sometimes it seems that the "bad news to good news" ratio in the world may be higher than 20 to 1. Maybe it's 100 to 1. Maybe 1000 to 1.

Well, I'm not going to go out and study this (and I don't recommend that you do, either!), but I will admit -- as positive, optimistic and solution-focused as I am -- that, yes, it's hard to remember the power of gratitude. Or, to put it another, more practical way: it's easy to forget to feel grateful.

Now, I'm not saying that to make anyone feel guilt (including me :). Feeling grateful is, sometimes, an uphill experience.

It's hard to see past the daily, ordinary (or maybe not so ordinary) problems and challenges of life. It's hard to find the clarity that we wish we could tap into. It's hard to remember and be alert to the things that really matter to us -- the things that keep us integrated, that nourish our spirits and bodies, that enable us to be loving, kind, peaceful people sharing a pretty weird journey (well, it is kind of weird) around a sun for...who knows how long? Decades for some, years for others, months, days...it's a mystery.

And it's a mystery that thrives and comes alive with gratitude.

My partner Anneli and me have created an ebook to help you bring more gratitude into your life -- regardless of how busy or complex it may be at times, or relaxing and simple it may be at other times. The ebook is aptly called The Book of Gratitude -- just click on the link and you'll instantly receive the ebook. It's also available at Anneli's remarkable self-help website: http://www.4lifeselfhelp.com/. I'd really suggest that you pay a visit -- and sign-up for your free newsletter while you're there.

See you tomorrow!

Lessons from Nature!

In this Information Age of ours, surrounded by some pretty cool, technically advanced “information sources” (like a blog for instance!), it’s easy to forget that, despite the amazing (and sometimes not-so-amazing) technical toys at our disposal, we’re still, well, PEOPLE. In other words: we’re organic expressions of nature; not mechanical bio-computers, however clever or intelligent we may think ourselves to be.

And because we are, thankfully, organic expressions of nature, we can – if we wish – take a step back from all of our bookmarked blogs, all of our DVDs (yes, this includes The Secret :), all of our workshops and seminars and other tools of learning in the Information Age, and simply re-connect with the source of it all: nature.

Indeed, if you can clearly and openly re-integrated with the natural world – and it could simply be a tree near your home or a lush tropical rainforest – you’ll find sources of information that will truly amaze you, and potentially transform you.

Really, it must be pretty hilarious for trees and rocks and mountains and flowers to listen to us human beings talk about “the Information Age” as if it’s something new. Do we really believe that anything in the world – that is, anything in nature – could exist, AT ALL, without being influenced by an incomprehensibly divine source of information? Information is natural; and, oddly, it seems that the only living things on the planet who don’t seem to grasp this eternal and rather ordinary fact, are human beings.

No wonder cats look at us like we’re…well, kind of stupid. We are!

Now, the point of this blog isn’t to remind us that we’re…stupid…but instead to invite you to take some time (how about today? How about right NOW?) and step back from your familiar sources of information: the Internet, your Secret DVD, your CDs, your books…whatever you learn from, and go outside and co-exist with something that has a more pure, more integrated connection with the SOURCE of information. In other words: go hang out for a while with a tree, or a rock, or a stream, or a flower.

And when you do, if you simply open yourself up – just as a flower or blade of grass is open and inviting – you’ll experience something…rather difficult to put into words. But I’ll try to put it in words, anyways (since a blank blog would be a bad idea…or maybe not?). You’ll experience insights, connections, clarity, spaciousness, and stillness that will nourish your information-starved soul. You’ll see elements in your own life, and the lives of those around you, that reveal themselves as patterns: which means that you can change them by changing something that you’re doing, or, more likely, the way that you’re doing it.

I know, I know. It sounds weird and “out there” and, really, who is out there marketing for “tree learning”? I mean, people sell all kinds of things – books, seminars, even Secret DVDs. But who is selling “hanging out with a tree”?

Just because nobody’s selling it to you, doesn’t mean that it’s worthless. In fact, it’s invaluable; and YOU have the potential to tap into that invaluable current of REAL information…not just knowledge and endless streams of thoughts and words. I’m talking clarity, insight and vision. THAT is information. THAT is what “informs” us.

So make an effort – a small effort, really, considering the other things you do in your busy life – and go hang out with something natural. A lake, a shrub, a tree…it doesn’t matter. Anything. Everything. The SKY.

Information does not belong to an “age.”

Information is your very nature…and it’s in nature still. We’ve forgotten.

The rocks, trees, flowers…and yes, the cats, still remember. So can you. So will you!

The "Secret" Fear...

Here’s something rather strange that I’ve noticed about “The Secret,” – and I’m guessing that with the imminent release of The Secret Sequel, I’ll notice even more and more of it (and so will you, if you care to join me in noticing these things…).

Here’s what I mean: have you noticed how many people seem to outright, categorically, and unhesitatingly REJECT everything about The Secret? It almost seems to border on hate. Why such rejection; why such hate?

I’ve reflected on this for a while, and the only answer that I can come up with (at least for now) is that deep down inside, people who go out of their way to tell you how much they hate or reject The Secret are not operating from the “calm, cool and collected plane” of logic and reason (think “Mr. Spock” from Star Trek) from which they claim to make their “arguments”. Instead, they seem to be coming from a place that is familiar to all of us in some way: fear.

Yup. Plain, ancient, ordinary, destructive fear. And what they fear is even more…interesting (for lack of a better word) than the fact that they’re afraid.

In my view, these people aren’t actually afraid of anything that the teachers on The Secret are saying. Why should they be? Why should anyone be? It’s not as if The Secret is advocating hatred, intolerance, violence, or anything harmful. Why be afraid of a bunch of people popping up on a DVD, politely and respectfully suggesting different ways of living, behaving and being? What’s so scary about that?

Here’s what’s so scary to these people. People who categorically and very defensively reject The Secret – and we’re not talking about people who disagree with it, but people who go out of their way to ensure that you and me disagree with it, too – are afraid of their OWN life and how it relates to what The Secret is saying.

Or, in simpler terms: many people have invested HEAVILY into a particular “life strategy.” They may have believed, for decades, that the problems and obstacles they encounter are 100% external and “out there” – other people, other situations, other blocks.

And now, a bunch of strangers show up on a DVD (of all places!) and politely suggest – just as teachers and mystics have been suggesting for…well, forever – that many of the problems we face aren’t “out there” at all; they’re merely reflections, projections, or extension of what is within us.

To a lot of people, that very POSSIBILITY that this could be true – even partially true, even barely true – is seen as an attack on that “heavy investment.” And so to avoid even the possibility of assessing The Secret; to avoid even speculating on whether there may be something “to” it or not, some people swiftly take an antagonistic position.

Of course, they use the standard tactics that you’d expect from people who, themselves, aren’t fundamentally convinced of what they’re saying, but instead operating from fear of what MAY be inside: mockery, fear-mongering, cynicism, sarcasm, and pretty much anything that can undermine the flight of another person who may be gently spreading vulnerable wings, ready to experience the possibility of living life in a new way.

The fact that others are willing to courageously attempt to fly – who knows where – is a threat to those who have invested heavily in chains that keep people on the ground. The flight of another is proof that flight is possible.

So the next time you see someone (usually in a blog, but sometimes perhaps right in your own home) ranting and raving about “The Secret” and how it’s a bunch of crazy new age nonsense (for lack of a harsher word :), before you respond in-kind, take a moment, step back, and ask yourself: is this person’s opinion coming from understanding…or from fear?

And if it’s coming from fear, remember: that fear probably has nothing to do with The Secret.

The fear is coming from within themselves. The “certainty” of their life – certainly miserable, yes, but still certain – is not-so-certain anymore. Other possibilities are presenting themselves; other options; other paths.

It takes no courage – at all – to crush the wings of one who is ready to try flying.